Operation be Social: Church Edition
I CAN DO THIS (This is a waste of your time. Do not read unless you are interested in the meaningless writings of a socially awkward female)
MY MISSION: Be more social at church with Christians.
I went in to church today trying to have an open mind. Blue-eyes (My boyfriend) had gone hunting with a friend so I would be facing the congregation alone. I knew I could do this. I had to prep myself before I got out of the car. Blue-eyes had friends in the church. I had met them a couple of times before but I had never spoken to them alone. I decided that when the pastor asked the church to shake hands I had to make polite conversation with at least one person. I walked in, overjoyed to see the majority of people wearing ugly sweaters. It wasn’t just because of my yearning for some Christmas cheer but my thankfulness to have the attention off of me. The usual people who greeted me every Sunday said hello. They can never remember my name. Today alone, I got called Ashley, Mackenzie, and Jessica. It doesn’t upset me! I’m actually grateful for it. Now I’m prepared with names I can use for when I finally do something so awkward- there is no turning back and I’m forced to change identities. I’m surprised it hasn’t happened yet.. or maybe I just have high standards of awkward?
I sat in the back hoping no one would notice me and I could save my words for the designated greeting time… I’m such a geek. Eventually, after a few announcements and hymns the pastor called for it. I stood and looked for a target. I saw Jace and his family. Jace and his wife Becca were both prior military and out of all of Blue-eyes friends I felt that I connected with them the most. I left the safety of my row and walked to the front simultaneously trying to be bubbly as I shook hands with people I passed. (Disgusting ritual) To my horror THEY DID NOT NOTICE ME. I hadn’t planned for this! Do I just stand their and wait? Do I have to touch one of them on the shoulder? I couldn’t bear to do that. I had already had to shake so many hands through the crowed. Do I retreat? No! I took a deep breath. I was on a mission. Dare I say- A mission from God. I needed to do this. I hesitantly pointed a finger and poked Jace on the shoulder. Bad move. He turned seemingly surprised to see me and offered a greeting. I responded with a hoarse hello and blanked. He came to the recue and asked me how I had been. Even extending out an invitation for me to sit with them. THANK GOD. I hung out with Blue-eyes’ friends for the remainder of the church service and even the fellowship meal afterwards. I would say that it was a job well done for this awkward chick! I’m feeling very accomplished. Hopefully next weekend I can implement phase two. That is where I find some way to get more involved in the church hopefully through some form of volunteering. I CAN DO THIS.
Tomorrow will be my first day back on the ship after having surgery on my kidneys. If anyone see’s this please be praying! I am so nervous. I have so much work to do! I know I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Have a good week!